It seems to help (Although I'm oh-so-aware of the placebo effect, response bias, and confirmation bias...). When K is having a hard time going to sleep because she's startling every 5 seconds, the weighted blanket and deep pressure seem to help. When she is quick to become fussy in public, the noise-dampening headphones seem to make a difference. She doesn't want to extend her neck, but a massage if her gums is enough to motivate her. I'm not going to lie...my mom is the one doing most of the therapy with her. K was asleep most of the time that Mom was over yesterday, thereby having less sensory work. Then K didn't sleep well last night. Coincidence?
It's easy to ignore K's sensory needs. The signs are stealth and covert. On Wednesday, I took K out more than usual. I consoled her fussiness through the errands just as I would have with the boys. The effect was that K's mouth and tongue got tighter and tighter until her eating got much less efficient and by the end of the night she was hacking and gagging the way she did before she was hospitalized in February. Yikes.
So...I'm leaning toward believing in sensory regulation and it blows my mind that I learned nothing of it in graduate school. And I am prone to hate it...because it's hard to measure, time consuming, and exhausting. Thank you, Mom!
My parents are saints. They have re-arranged their lives to help Keira and perhaps more so to prevent me from caving in. Sometimes lately I fret that they are enabling me now...I'm used to having my laundry folded and Keira's therapy done, so I have little impetus to pick that up on my own. Jeff says that's not necessarily a bad thing. I didn't mean to take over their lives.
The last couple of weeks have been rough. I can't keep my mood and energy up consistently. I'm often tired and feel like making a phone call is too taxing. Whereas Jeff and I seem to typically take turns having worn down times- subconsciously compensating for each other- we've both been out of it lately. Yikes.
I've found myself a little Facebook-obsessed with other peoples' tragedy this week. An old friend who was recently in a terrible accident. An acquaintance who had a baby who may have a genetic disorder. Vera and Evie. I suppose I want to know how they're getting along..affirmation that we're doing ok. I recently heard a saying that the best cure for sadness is to hear about other peoples' sadness.
Liam about broke my heart the other day. He said to me, "I can't wait til Keira gets bigger so I can take care of her!" If he only knew.. . At Wendy's the other night, we were sitting near a cute 9-month-old who was seated in a high chair, waving, and eating French fries. I refrained from pointing out to Liam the differences between that baby and his sister. Jeff, the wise old sage that he is, reminded me that Liam may have the blessing of never being sad about his sister.
Things to look forward to: Jeff and I are going away for a night this weekend (taking K with us) to celebrate our 12th anniversary. Thanks for the deal, Pat! In July, we're taking the kids to the Oregon coast for a few days. Thanks for the deal, Mary!
I'm on a mission to get some cute pics of K soon. She's so hard to photograph!
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