4! (A Birthday Album)

Keira turned four on September 9th. And what an eventful four years it's been. I feel like I've aged twenty, but I'm so thankful for all of the family and friends around us who have lived this past four years with us. To steal the title of a new movie coming out...there's been a lot of "collateral beauty."

I was really excited for Keira's birthday. For months, I had been meeting regularly with the moms of some of Keira's therapy-mates. We've become good friends. I was excited to have a party for Keira in which I could invite her little buddies. We invited several of her friends as well as their families. Our new patio was completed just in time and so the birthday party served as a little housewarming as well.

The day of the party, Keira seemed excited. She clearly knew there was something special going on. You are My Sunshine seemed to be the perfect theme, not only for us, but for all of her little friends. Keira wore the bright yellow dress that her brothers brought her from Hawaii. Only 2 kiddos and their parents were able to attend, but we had a good time. A craft. Trampoline time. Dinner. Her friends brought some very thoughtful gifts (She's not easily interested in your average toys, so this was very touching).

I have to admit, though, that after the party, I was extremely let down. I was surprised at myself. Not sure why I was upset. To me, the party felt off. Maybe a little forced. It stressed me out that I didn't know whether Keira was having fun or not. Whether or not she liked having all these people over. She had about an hour in which she tolerated all the hubbub, but then she seemed to close in. She wasn't interested in tasting the cake. She was too overwhelmed to open presents with all the guests there. I suppose the party was just a reminder, a flashing sign, reminding me that Keira isn't "normal." In the end, I think the party was worthwhile. We'll do it again.